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May 13, 2005
"You've Got Your Hands Full"
Today I had this statement thrown at me 3 times . . . in reference to my 4 boys. It wasn't that I really had my hands full, I think it was the other people were overwhelmed that I had 4. The last time I checked a handful is 5 so I've still got room!!
I often laugh and act perplexed when people see me with 4 boys, ages 8 to 1, and they make comments like, "Wow! 4 boys!" or like I heard today "You've got your hands full." Or my favorite judgemental statement by a woman who passed me while I was going into Wal-Mart one day, "Oh! have fun!" she said in a snide way as if I was about to jump into a snake pit. To this woman I cheerfully replied to her back as she was walking away from me - "We usually do!!" Other statement that I've gotten are "Are they ALL yours?" or "Are you babysiting?" or "4 BOYS - I bet there's never a quiet moment at your house."
Some of my favorite responses are "Would you say that if I had 4 girls?" Or like to the woman in the chiropractors office today that said, "3 boys, huh?" I said, "No, 4...so far!" Because that's the truth. We actually ENJOY our children and people (even some CHRISTIANS!) can not even think beyond the 2.8 children that is the national average. And, unlike the unbelieving world (and again some Christians) we want as many blessings of children that the Lord has planned for us. I love and embrace my role as Mom, and I tell my children and husband that often.
Many people also marvel at the fact that I actually take all 4 with me wherever I go! I take them to the flower shop, grocery store, mall, chiropractors office, gardening center, art center, airport, Pella Tulip Festival, to see President Bush last fall... If I didn't want to take them with me, I would have gotten a puppy instead!!
So, why is it that so many have such a negative view of children? And if you have more than 2 it almost seems like you're weird? Is it because parents generally care more about themselves and their own personal situations to engage with their children and actually nurture them and train them in the way they should go whether they're Christian or not? Do parents not realize the incredible responsibility THEY have to educate and pass on their knowledge to the next generation?
Why is it that so many people (say age 45 and under) respond so negatively to me and my 4 children when we're in public? I will also add here that 95% of the time they are very well behaved. 5% accounting for a fussy child that's tired, or just having an off day. They must be well behaved if my mom takes all 4 places with her also!!
So, what do you think? No, really!! I'm really curious when people see a mom with 4 or more children what goes through their mind. Is it positive, negative, overwhelmed at the thought, glad it's not you, think it's cool, wonder why, wish it was you... Truly explore your thoughts and be conscious of what you think - I'd really like to know.
Posted by Vanessa at May 13, 2005 11:24 PM
Comments
I think it's freakin' awesome! I'm hoping for six! But maybe I should wait and see if God has it for me to get married before I set that goal! Hehe!
Posted by: Christy at May 16, 2005 11:13 AM