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August 17, 2004
a little bit sad
im back and so is half the student population. now that the insanity of turnover and moving has come to an end (or so we will say since my room is still a disaster ) and we have internet at our house again (big props to mike biang and pat blair!) i have returned to the blog scene...i know, i know contain your excitement.
well in the midst of all the craziness i believe that my whole "graduation" has finally begun to set in. funny as it may seem, i think that even with all the talk in may about how everything in my life would be changing, i didn't really buy it. and continued to live in a semi state of denial all summer long as i lived out of only a few unpacked boxes, didn’t really know what the fall would look like and worked at good ole' taraccino. but now... oh but now folks no more is the bliss of the illusion.
"real life" is beginning to set in. elizabeth bought books the other day, for a second i panicked then realized... "not i said the fly" no books for me. heather printed off her schedule of classes... me? no classes and i found myself just feeling weird walking across campus the other day. i started thinking about how many times i had walked that exact same sidewalk and that i wouldn't ever again, at least not like that.
this morning i had to say goodbye to a good taraccino friend. he came super early and brought a camera to take pics of us and celebrate my last tuesday. and as he left he gave me the best hug. i just couldn't help it as i let go the tears welled up. and lorry got talking about me leaving and kelsey got all misty eyed as she told me that no matter what it wouldn't be the same when i left, i just realized what a huge part of my life that little coffee shop has been for the last three years. the people have become a real family to me and some of my most valued friends. i am so very excited to start my "real" job and go hard after what i believe God has called me to, but wow i never suspected being on the other side of barista would be so tough.
then the kicker was last night as we hung out in the dorms, visiting friends and meeting new folks. i cant quite express how it felt to watch such a normal part of life, like moving into a room, go on without you when deep down it is really all you know. it all felt so surreal, like i just wasn't sure what to do with myself. funny how fast four years goes when you are looking back. i just got done arguing with bart in my backyard about whether or not he will miss it all after this year. and though i cant deny i am still glad to be done and wouldn't go back, the bottom line is ...you do miss it and today was just a little bit sad.
Posted by Emily at August 17, 2004 11:53 AM
Comments
welcome back em! :)
Posted by: leah at August 17, 2004 01:47 PM
I would like to be the first to say "WELCOME" to our newest community member.
We should start our own ministry team: "Former towers/Friley droppouts"
:)
Posted by: matt at August 17, 2004 03:21 PM
i knew the CM stab would come up sooner or later, thanks matt for being the lucky one to plug it first
Posted by: em at August 17, 2004 03:51 PM
mwaahahahahha
Posted by: Matt at August 18, 2004 10:09 AM
I can relate, Em. It is sad! Life changes so much after graduation... the worst part is there's no more naps with a real job!
Posted by: Jamie at August 18, 2004 08:20 PM
No there aren't. And that it is more than a little bit sad.
Posted by: mike at August 19, 2004 09:49 AM