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May 11, 2005
the real world...
...okay, so maybe not the real world, but at least the post-undergraduate summer. it's been...interesting.
first of all, those of you who know about my stressing out about my family and the graduation party, get this...not only did my parents act civil, they ALL sat at the same table the whole time with their respective spouses. it was amazing. i never even expected or asked that of God.
sunday was spent adjusting to real life. unpacking, rearranging, grocery shopping. all wonderful, of course. as much as i have loved being in the dorms, transitioning into a real home has been awesome. i love being at home by myself, cooking, cleaning, and keeping the stereo cranked. yes, yes, moving in has brought out the susie homemaker in me...
monday morning brought my first day of real work. i was pretty nervous. after all, all semester long, i've only been at this job three hours a day. and let me tell you, these past few weeks had been HARD. i did not want to sit through any more document review and training. i just wanted to do my friggin' job. but guess what! it's been wonderful!! i LOVE what i do. i've done more random clerical tasks in the past couple days than i ever have before. and the hours fly by...no problem at all.
i've totally been shown God's favor in this job. i get to set my own hours so after i went to the Lone Strangers concert and got home way too late last night, i was able to go in an hour later this morning. and since i can take an hour for lunch, i was able to have lunch and say goodbye to christie yesterday, emily today.
and even though those conversations have been hard (for different reasons that i won't be blogging about at this moment...give me a call if you need the details), God gave me the grace to be able to go back to work and interact with my co-workers in a pretty normal, composed way. seriously, in the car today, i was like, okay God, i'm not okay at all right now, but i have to go back to work, please help me. and being the amazingly faithful God he is (yes, i'm playing captain obvious at the moment).
i made it through the whole afternoon and my co-workers and i went out after work. i've never had the "buck burgers" experience before, but it was not as scary as i thought it might be. i played two games of pool--the second of which i made the winning shot on. it was so good to get to know my co-workers more. you guys can pray God does a lot there this summer.
anyway, now i'll sit around for a bit, go for a run, and then relax for the night. i'm hoping to spend a lot of time with God this summer...figuring out my life. i suspect there will be a lot of hard decisions coming up for me. everything seems to be pointing to grad school...
and here i sit, seeing the evidence of God's leading, and most likely his will for my life, but i find myself wanting to say, no! i don't have the faith that you will help me make it if i have to stay in ames for three more years. i have a feeling this is going to be a stretching, tear-filled summer. but it will be good, i know it will be...
You hear, O LORD, the desire of the afflicted;
you encourage them, and you listen to their cry... Ps 10:17
i was really encouraged by this verse. God knows my desires, he hears me, and he will reply with much help...
Yet I am poor and needy;
may the Lord think of me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
O my God, do not delay. Ps 40:17
Posted by Autumn at May 11, 2005 07:17 PM